Muni Gone WILD | Every ride is a trip

Believe it or not, sometimes a Muni ride can be pretty slow…

How does one pass the time? I like to star at my fellow busriders. Because Muni stirs up the WILD side in us all, it is not difficult to visualize that cute patron missing some of his/her clothing…

Drumroll, please…

The official song of the 2008 Bay to Breakers Muni Gone WILD float will be:

“Another One Rides the Bus,” by none other than Weird Al Yankovic. Watch the music video and commit to memory!

The dinner and romance of Valentine’s Day screeched to a halt when I, about a month ago, was run over by a San Francisco taxicab. 16th and Valencia is normally home to burritos, ice cream carts, and sunny weather; this dreadful morning, though, the intersection witnessed a devastating upset in civilization’s favorite internal combustion game: man vs. machine.

My two-wheeled 150cc Vespa collided with a four-wheeled taxi and I have a broken leg to prove it. I was traveling about 30mph eastbound on 16th Street, the cabbie was going westbound also at about 30mph. That’s an estimated 60 miles per hour of force. The driver made a sharp turn onto Valencia, but failed to see this blog contributor as he rammed directly into the side of my bike, throwing me to the pavement and smashing my scooter into oblivion.

I still remember many things as I fell to the ground– hearing the onlookers shout, watching the medics cut through my perfectly good clothes, and finally arriving to San Francisco General. Yet, very honestly, the most pressing thought at the time, even as I realized my right leg wouldn’t move, was that my Vespa may not survive this one.

The silver beauty was my pride and joy. I managed a college coffee shop for two years to pay it off, lovingly wheeled it through my kitchen for safekeeping during upstate New York winters, and most of all, rode it hard. Many of my fondest memories, especially going full throttle with Erin singing in the wind, are associated with that blessed machine. And relevant to the MGW mission, my scooter purchase proved that getting around town doesn’t require belching tons of diesel fumes.

For the simple reason that you can live large and fill-up small, two-wheelers are the kings of private transit. Taxicabs, on the contrary, are the lowest of the low– carbon bigfoots and the nemesis of public transportation.

But the best of private transit is still not public transit. I live to tell all readers that taking transportation of any kind into your own hands is risky. You may face dangerous and unpleasant circumstances. You may have titanium rod and screw implants. You may not even live to tell your tale. The safer and easier bet is climbing into an enormous, practically bombproof Muni trolleybus to have the driver chauffeur you around. No risk of bodily harm here.

Even dangling off the edge of a Cable Car comes with Muni’s guarantee to safely deliver passengers to their destinations. Moreover, with someone doing the driving for you, your daily commute is transformed into a luxury experience. Suddenly a ride across town can substitute as productive work time, relaxing rest time, or in the case of MGW, reckless playtime.

As the triumphant survivor to a major auto-borne trauma, I advise two things:

1) if you demand immediate mobility and unparalleled freedom, buy a Vespa, but be sure to invest in a sturdy helmet; otherwise

2) ride the San Francisco rails.

I’m a 23 year-old recent transplant to San Francisco, and have become a true citizen of this city. I recently signed up at my local library and have been getting my free books fairly often, at a place that could be easily mistaken for a glorious locker room for the homeless with flowers in their hair. Yes, I live in Haight Ashbury. The library is about 5 blocks from my house, a nice, brisk walk, good for the heart.

I pretty much always take the 33. And I have a FastPass, which means I own the city. I love Muni. I really do.I live on the 33, but I also take the N-Judah, 6-Parnassus and 71-Haight-Noriega to get places downtown. Then the 43-Masonic to get to Trader Joe’s. I live and die by 511.org and 311 on the phone. I know which stops have the Onion and SF Weekly, and I tear out the crosswords to do on the ride.

I’m not a perfect rider: I miss stops a lot. I get on the wrong direction. My favorite spot is not the back seat, but the row right before. I only sit on the facing-forward seats, which minimizes your lurching forward and contact with smelly old people and their shopping bags.

Rest assured, me and Muni are tight. I’m looking forward to contributing on this hilarious blog. And will DEFINITELY be rocking our bus at Bay to Breakers.

Check out my blog!

Kisses

The delightful fleshy pink and corn yellow colors of March’s Fast Pass are striking indeed. The yellow reminds me of the Pittsburg BART line, while the fleshy pink reminds me of something else.

To match with this March’s MUNI pass, I’ve selected a printed T-Bags dress. The colors in the dress compliment this month’s pass perfectly! This dress is also great for Spring because its so versatile! Wear it by its self with flip flops during a day spent shopping around town. At night when it starts to get chilly, add a denim jacket (mine’s from jcrew) and dress it up with a pair of wedges (I recently bought THIS PAIR in two colors). The perfect bag for this look is the roomy Ananas bag in cream. I use this bag all the time and its a totally worthwile investment.

What do you wear to match your Fast Pass?

Wednesday morning, a protest and march kicked off the 5th anniversary of the invasion of Iraq. Never to miss an opportunity to assert their revulsion with the war, the SFPD made haste to participate.

First, a convey of police Suburbans, marked and unmarked cars made a symbolic progression from Market Street up Bush Street, in the wrong direction. This gesture obviously was the SFPD representing the fact that our country is going the wrong way and needs to turn around. Just like this administration, the police convey stubborning and screamingly forged ahead against rush hour traffic. Only with great effort and several near-casualties did our heroic officers traverse the four blocks to Kearney Street.

The convey meets the police bus on Montgomery.

SF Police care about the environment! That’s why they requisitioned a HYBRID Muni bus!
There they met up with many more officers. In fact so many officers wanted to participate in the rally that they requisitioned a Muni bus! Notice the POLICE SERVICE on the sign. Truly WILD!

Motorcycle police escort a bus of more police. There were likely >100 officers in support! Truly the best use of police resources.

In fact there were so many police in support, they traveled in front, behind, and all around the parade. One could almost say the police dominated the event! Good thing they were there in support.

MGW must take off its hat in salute to San Francisco’s finest!

Witnessed on the 108 inbound from Treasure Island:

On a crowded bus, a man standing in the middle of the aisle decided to take off his coat and shirt and stand mid-Muni sans shirt. The man next to him (these two individuals didn’t know eachother) says to the bare chested man, “Dude, I ain’t got no dollar bills!”

Nina enjoys the high-caliber men who court her on Muni, especially on the Dirty 30.  She goes WILD for hot bus mechanics as well.

To keep track of the size of our team, MGW has created a Bay to Breakers signup on Facebook. Please RSVP on the page.

To the best of our knowledge, Facebook doesn’t allow links to event pages. So you have to search for it. Search in the SF network for Muni Gone WILD

If you don’t have Facebook just drop us a line.

The 2008 Muni Gone WILD Bay to Breakers Conceptual Float has been released. The idea is to build a Muni bus out of plywood. It will carry WILD passengers and sufficient beer. Features include beer bong trolley poles, hand brakes and a stereo system.

Construction is slated to start in late March. If you posess a skilled trade, MGW wants YOU!
Contact the team

And don’t forget to sign up on the Facebook page.